Nimshi – the angel that flew away ..

This time again, it was another friend, Sam, who posted in FB on his daughter, today.

Sam, the devout south Indian Christian who has suffered only hardships in life. Lost his father at an early age, struggled financially to complete his Rubber Technology degree, worked in Rubber Processing plants as Engineer, ventured into ERP, burnt his entire wallet in learning SAP, struggled to make ends meet without a job, joined IT as a trainee at an age when he should have been a manager, coded along with freshers who were 10 years younger to him, climbed an agony ridden path to financial stability and all along the way continued to proclaim his contentment in Jesus and in life for having a wonderful family of a caring wife, two cheerful children and an elderly mother.

So contented and family oriented was he that despite having a H1-B visa, he chose not to travel to the US to work on long assignments – he didn’t want his children’s education to suffer and leave behind his mother- mind it, he still had to pay debts due to the SAP course.

Sam was also gifted with a sense of humor that his self deprecating wise-cracks were the talk of the town. Never one to grumble and never one to begrudge, he took things in his stride with a smile always saying that he was happy with what he had. Well, in common parlance, one could even call him an ‘asattu ammanji” – not being worldly wise and making some quick buck in the short while. He lacked the capacity to do that.

One day, his 14 year old daughter Nimshi complained of headache while he was working from home. She was so tired that he fed her a soup. She vomited and complained of more headache. He comforted her with pain balm and took her to a nearby hospital all the while messaging his boss for 1 day leave. The nearest hospital was not helpful and he went to the second best in town to be informed that there was no hope. Five days of ventilator support later, he oversaw his angel removed from ventilator support and prepare for the heavenly abode. Thus ended the little angel’s brief time with him on earth.

Medical fraternity attributed this to ‘Coloidal Cyst’.

Wikipedia said “A colloid cyst is a cyst containing gelatinous material in the brain. It is almost always found just posterior to theforamen of Monro in the anterior aspect of the third ventricle, originating from the roof of the ventricle. Because of its location, it can cause obstructive hydrocephalus and increased intracranial pressure. These cysts account for approximately 1% of all intracranial tumors. 

Symptoms can include headache, vertigo, memory deficits, diplopia, behavioral disturbances and in extreme cases, sudden death. The developmental origin is unclear, though they may be of endodermal origin, which would explain the mucin-producing, ciliated cell type" - whatever 

 True to self, Sam reported to work soon, started taking assignments while still waiting for the 6 o’clock daily call from his daughter only to be reminded of her non-presence by the absence of her call.

Now-a-days, he doesn’t want to disturb his family and hence stops his car beneath the fly over and cries out aloud regularly at the same time. The school where Nimshi went to, though he wants to avoid on his way back from work, reminds him of the absence of his angel. Hence cries again in front of the school.

Now he has some questions :

1. Why did the angel come into his life, splash his life with happiness for 14 years and just vanish in a matter of 3 hours ?
2. He never asked for this beautiful angel in the first place. He didn’t even aspire for one. But she came , or shall we say, was sent by God ?
3. Why did she bring such happiness to him and the family with such characteristics that any parent would want from their child ? Why was she the embodiment of such virtues and why did she vanish ?
4. What wrong did Sam do to lose her that too so early ? More so, his wife and even more so, the little brother ? Sam was so polite that he dared not even ask for the refund for his SAP course once he didn’t get the job that they promised.
5. If it is God’s design to ‘test’ Sam to see if he is truly devoted to HIM, is not He supposed to be merciful and benevolent?
6. If it is not due to Sam, then is it due to Nimshi herself ? Is it due to her ‘sins’ in her previous birth, also called ‘Karma’ as per tradition ? If so, why should she face such a violent departure with no notice?
7. Is she not still a child, not even knowing about herself ? If so, how could she be held responsible for anything related to a previous birth ( luckily Christianity doesn’t believe in previous birth stories ). Even then, how to explain this ?
8. Why should the angel have been let into this world at all if she was needed so soon ?
9.  What was accomplished in 14 years ? Three per million have this colloidal cyst , it seems. So, what is this point of answering this statistical question while the moral question to God is not answered ?
10. Sam is a man committed to God who took HIS verses seriously. But he is still seeking answer to the fundamental question : Why my angel, so soon, so fast and so cruel ?
11. One foundational question : What is this design all about ? What is logical in this case of the angel going back in 14 years when she didn’t even know what was happening to her.
12. Why to Sam, the purist, the eternal common man who is contented with life and family and has placed himself in God ?

So was it colloidal cyst or a tyrannical twist or a tryst with destiny ?

Sam and I were trying to figure this out in a phone call that lasted more than an hour. Not sure if we found that while Sam seeks solace from funding a church in the angel's name. 

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