Why are Raja & Azhagiri better than Sashi Tharoor ?

So, what did Azhagiri do wrong that has made him the so-called 'villain' in the Indian Parliament ? What was the heinous crime committed by Azhagiri ? He didn't answer questions pertaining to his ministry. He didn't do so because he hadn't attended Parliament since the last one year.He didn't attend theParliamanent since the last one year because he was preoccupied with other foreign travels. International business development pertaining to his ministry probably. So there is reason enough for him not to be able to attend Parliament and hence not answer questions. So what is the noise in the media about ? Let us imagine that Azhgiri had attended Parliamament and answered questions.

How would that have mattered ? Would the Fertilizer prices have come down to the delight of the farmers ? Would the price of the essential grains have come down thus bringing down the inflation ? Could the answers have saved the farmers from committing suicides ?

So what is the large debate about ? If this is about the vacation that Azhagiri had in Maldives when the Parliament was in session, even then that does not matter. This too doesn't matter because nothing ever gets done in the Parliament now-a-days. Azhagiri's probable answers would have helped the opposition members to stage a walk out thus compensating for missing their morning walks, if they had missed them.

So when the opposition asked the Speaker of the Lok Sabha to know about the whereabouts of Azhagiri, she expressed her ignorance. So did the Prime Minister. So when the Prime Minister himself is not concerned about the whereabouts of his Cabinet Minister, why should the opposition be concerned ? Just because they are opposition members why should they oppose ? How does the opposition dare ask about the whereabouts of Azhagiri ? The Prime Minister's ignorance can be pardoned as it is a well known fact that the PM does not have a say in who should be in his Cabinet. It is decided by Powers-that-be and he is a mute spectator. Therefore asking the Prime Minister about one of his cabinet ministers is atrocious.

Then what is the point of bringing in Shashi Tharror here ? How does he compare with Azhagiri ?

Well, here you have the suave and highly erudite Tharoor on the one hand who was a minister of state and on the other hand you had Azhagiri on whom you cannot attribute these qualities. And it is not Azhagiri's fault that he cannot be the repository of such attributes.

But, even with these admirable attributes, Tharoor is not even a minister of state but Azhagiri continues to be a Cabinet Minister even without attending Parliament for the last one year. So, who is better ? Here is a Cabinet Minister who is not answerable to the Parliament, leave alone the Prime Minister. He still continues to be a minister whereas Tharoor is busy cooling his heels in 'God's own land'.

Let us, for a moment leave alone Tharoor's in-experience in handling a woman accomplice and ineptitude in handling a smaller scam to the tune of Rs.70 crores. Mind it, this was not public money / government money - this was private money in a black money diven private enterprise called as the IPL.

With all erudition and suave diplomatic characteristics, Tharoor was booted out of Parliament in a manner that not even Shibu Soren, a convict, is entitled to. His explanations were not even heard in the IPL row. When he attempted to speak, his words were not received at all. That was because he did not belong to a political class that has made politics as a means of earning money without any compunctions; a class that has made general public opinion a matter of print fit only for tissue paper; a class that has ensured that great political debate does not occur in the parliament. And here is a politician who has had dubious credentials as the chief of a fiefdom to the south of Tamil Nadu and who has created a new method of wining elections with blatant disregard to the norms yet still continues to be an Union Minister even without attending Parliament for the last one year. And there is this Prime Minister who doesn't know where his Cabinet Minister was. Of course the PM wouldn't have been taken by surprise this time as he has had this experience already when Shibu Soren went underground for some time even while being an Union Minister.

Hence, Azhagiri, the minister who is eternally present in Madurai, is far better suited to Indian politics than the erstwhile UN Under Secretary General. Tharoor is fit only for the US and not for us, the Indians while Azhagiri is fit to represent us in Parliament, although in eternal absentia, from Maldives.

Next in line is Raja. Sssshhhhh. Never talk about him. Just like you should not talk about "In-Justice" Dinakaran. However taller might be their acts of misdemeanor, they should not be acted upon and neither should they be talked about. That is social-justice as these two belong to a special class that Karunanidhi often talks about.

Some 'Rationalist Derivations'

Day after day, you keep hearing the heroic deeds of the 'warrior' class called 'Tamils'. Not a day passes without a special mention about the 'tamil pride' and erstwhile bravery of the 'Thalapathis' and 'Anja Nenjans' ( loosely translated as 'Commanders' and 'fear-less hearts' respectively) in many a news paper. Special functions are held every alternate day to appreciate some leader of the 'tamil pantheon' for some supposedly brave act, an impossible feat that was supposed to have been accomplised by the person who is sought to be appreciated. Titles and awards flow freely in the state with every person awarding the other and the other reciprocating the gesture. If you happen to see two people talking in the street then the probablity of one giving away an award to the other cannot be discounted. Don't ask as to what the award was for. An award has to be presented to somebody on a daily basis and that is a sacrosanct duty of the tamil populace. No questions to be asked by the news papers. They usually don't for the large amounts of advertisement material from the powers that be. So, why spoil the steady revenue flow ? Did somebody mention 'freedom of the press' and 'un-biased reporting' ? Probably you are referring to some words that are not even present in the dictionary. Now is the period in history where news papers are paid to publish a news. Leave alone the awards. Let us look at the titles that prefix the names of the dignitaries. As per our tamil nadu's tradition, one is supposed to address another by the title and not by one's name. If you happen to mention somebody's name, even by mistake, then you should probably belong to the so-called upper echelons of the society who does not want to recognize the title holder by the title. How dare you invoke one by his / her name ? Sacrilege, you see. Some titles and the spirit behind the same :

1. "Amma" - In ancient times used to refer to one's mother. But of late has come to mean only one person in the 'Rationalist Republic of Tamil Nadu'. If you happen to mention the true name of this person, then you are probably against the female gender and you are probably a male chauvenist.
2. "Annai" - This also used to mean one's mother. Currently means the female power center that reigns the country by proxy from New Delhi. Don't ever mention the name for a CBI case would be filed against you anytime soon.
3. "Kalaignar" - Originally used to mean an artist. Its current synonyms roughly translate as "An expert in the three forms of the tamil language", " The Thiruvalluvar who is alive", "The Head of the Tamil Family Worldwide", "The Tamil Language", "The Tamil Motherhood's only son" etc
4. "Udan Pirappu" - originally meant one's sibling. Currently means the grass roots worker of the party of "Kalaignar". Literal meaning would vary from 'readily available human-self-immolation-inventory' to 'humans spending all their lives for the DMK to the detriment of their own family'. In otherwords means 'a sacrificial goat'. They are also the only readers of the party organ 'Murasoli' and who who get paid to attend party meetings.
5. "Rathaththin Raththam" - literal meaning - blood of the blood. Not sure what that means. Probably should mean the DNA, RNA, Haemoglobin etc of the blood. Currently means the equivalent of 'Udan Pirappu' in the AIADMK. This group waits in the hot sun for over 12 hours to have a darshan of 'Amma' for 2 minutes.
6. "Thalabathy" - No, not the tamil film of the same name. Currently represents the only person in tamil nadu - the Right Honourable Deputy Chief Minister who is also one of the chosen the sons of the Chief Minister ( in other words "Kalaignar"). Not sure about the wars that he had led from the front.
7. 'Anja Nenjan" - Literally means 'the heart that has no fear'. Currently means the other son of the CM. He also happens to be an Union Minister of Chemicals. Inquiries into the relation between his educational qualifications and the position that he holds are un-warranted. Such inquiries shall expedite one's funeral. He has the innate capability to represent the people of Tamil Nadu in the Parliament without having spoken even once for them in the august assembly. A gifted non-speaker whose ignorance of both Hindi and English has not handicapped him from being an MP. Person who has devised a new electoral mechanism wherein money automatically lands itself in the hands of the voters in white envelopes prior to elections. No body has been able to identify the source of money. Probably Scotland Yard detectives are needed for the same.
8. "Eezha Thamizh Thalabathy" - This could be loosely attributed to Thirumavalavan, Nedumaran, Vaiko and the lot. Anybody who raises ones' decibel levels over the others on the Sri Lankan issue at any point in time could be termed as Eezha Thamizh Thalabathy. In the current political scenario this does not fetch any electoral dividend and hence has been discarded by the ruling DMK. Therefore there are many left-over-chasers who have been detailed above.
9. "Varungaala Mudhalvar" - Literally means the 'future chief minister'. India is so free that anybody can use this title. In fact, it has become a practice to invoke just-born children with this title. Latest entrant into this 'elite-club' is Mr.Karthik Chidambaram whose only qualification is that he is the son of Mr.P.Chidambaram.
10. "Doctor" - Literally means the person who practises medicine as a profession. Currently means who has enough money to lavish on the ruling party so that he could be conferred with this title. Chances are, if you happen to pass by an university, you will be 'doctored' on a first come first serve basis. Otherwise how do you call Stalin a Doctor ?

Tamil Films, NASA, et al

The insatiable ability of the tamil people to bear with such nonsense is to be admired at sincerely. Yes, I am talking about the TV programmes in Tamil that too of the SUN kind. For the n-th possible time the network broadacasts the arrival of a new tamil film that has everything in it that can qualify the movie for a porn-certificate if only it does not have the gravity defying stunt sequences and gory blood-soaked scenes. How does one stand this kind of non-stop-nonsense ? One the one hand you have the very slim and un-shaven hero putting to question all known laws of physics by his stunt scenes while on the other hand we have the heroine who appears time and again in so less costumes that one begins to take pity at her inability to cover the bare essential surface areas of her body. Added to that are the dance sequences ( you need to believe that those are dances ) that are nothing but aerobic exercises in fast-forward fashion of the most skimpily clad girls on the screen. There is also this very essential duty of the heroine to reassure the viewers that her body anatomy is in order and that her cholesterol levels are slightly bordering on the higher side. This she does by appearing in the most skimpily designed costumes ( if you can call them costumes ) that don't have any semblance of any culture ( leave alone tamil culture ). Probably the heroine reminds the viewers that the tamil populace have a very distant origin -- trying to prove Darwin's Theory that man evolved from apes. Probably that is why she apes the apes. The point to be noted is that the mother of the heroine ( a widow 99% of the time ) would be so poor that she wouldn't have the means to buy a replacement saree. She would appear in the same saree all through the film. Additionally there is this handicapped-yet-brilliant brother of the heroine. ( No marks for guessing that the handicap would have been caused by the villain either by way of an 'accident' or by way of making the heroine's mother drink some liquid that could cause deformity of the foetus). Then you have the ubiquitous comedian. The person or persons who would need to have his private parts hurt everytime he appears on the scene - that is how you need to define a comedian. Going by the number of times the comedian Vadivelu has been thrashed below the belt, one can safely assume that he would not need to wear any safety guard attire if he would choose to play cricket anytime in the future. Then come the ubiquitous villain - most likely a local politician who is surrounded by a bunch of goons sporting attire of every concievable nature. And the only intention of the politician would be to get rid of this gravity-defying hero.

NASA would do well to initiate technology transfer from Tamil filmdom unto themselves in the lines of how to make a human being stay afloat in air for a prolonged period of time and at the same time perform acrobatics. The other area of tech transfer could pertain to the ability of the hero to dodge any number of bullets fired from a machine gun. This could be useful in helping astronauts escape from the occassional meteorite while in space.